Loveless and Baggage

From a proposed take-off on the burlesque British history 1066 and All That tentatively titled 6502 and All That:

Ada Loveless invented female programmers. Before her time, while there were no programmers, they were all male. This was a Good Thing, however, because during WWII all computers were female. In America, many of these computers were wax, while in Britain they were usually wrens found belching in the park.

Ada Loveless was the daughter of the famous author and entrepreneur H. P. Loveless. When he was not writing horror stories, H. P. Loveless was busy founding HP, a Packard dealership and garage just off Woz Way in Silicon Valley. HP was famous for getting its Way. Anyone who prevented HP from getting its Way was forced to donate several hours polishing the cars backwards. This was known as Reverse Polish Donation, and was a Good Thing.

Ada Loveless was British, and so of course was close friends with Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin, Charles Bronson (of the literary Bronson sisters, Charles, Emily, and Ann), and Charles Baggage, an engineer on the Jacquard-Turing Line.

Baggage was famous for not inventing the computer, which he didn’t do twice. He didn’t invent the computer so well that today he has a museum named after him, called the Computer History Museum. He also invented steampunk and talking about technology at cocktail parties, so not inventing the computer was perhaps a Good Thing.

Here’s a link to 1066 and All That. If I get around to it, I guess I could provide links to the following things, to explain all the references:

Ada Lovelace, first programmer
Women as computers
WACs and WRENs
Bletchley Park
Ada’s father
H. P. Lovecraft
Hewlett-Packard
The HP Garage
The HP Way
Steve Wozniak and Hewlett-Packard
Woz Way
Reverse Polish Notation
Charles Babbage
Dickens, Darwin, and Babbage’s soirees
The Jacquard loom
Alan Turing
Charles Bronson (the British one)
The Bronte sisters
The Computer History Museum
Steampunk