The Fine Print

If you are a webmaster or are otherwise affiliated with any website in any manner, or are an independent software developer or an executive or employee or contractor or representative of a corporation or partnership or sole proprietorship or other legal or quasi-legal or illegal entity that develops, designs, writes, builds, architects, reverse-engineers, sells, markets, distributes, vends, advertises, promotes, hawks, pimps for, or otherwise causes or helps to cause any form of software, firmware, vaporware, or other ware including but not restricted to any form of ware currently or ever conceived by the mind of man or other intelligent or non-intelligent species in the known universe or any universe discovered or created subsequent to the date of this note, not to exclude wares in existence at the time of this note but only subsequently discovered, to come into existence or into a market, whether shrinkwrap, shareware, shopping mall, high street, e-commerce, brick-and-mortar, third-world bazaar, black, gray, or any other color or kind of market, you agree by using this site, where “using” means to visit, link to, refer to, or think about, to be bound by the Irrevocable Condition of Use of this selfsame site, to wit: you shall in perpetuity and retroactively to both ends of time absolve the author of this site, i.e., one Michael Swaine of Grants Pass, Oregon, of any requirements imposed by any shrinkwrap agreements or site licenses associated with your products or sites. This agreement void where prohibited by men with guns. 
-Michael Swaine
, 10/10/03, via the Wayback Machine.